Deathly Noted

Fwhat?

2008-09-03T02:04:39Z

Getting flamed about how craptastic my artwork is the other day (which made me cry) actually had to be one of the best things that ever happened to me. It totally motivated me for college (started at RIT yesterday, majoring in New Media Design & Imaging, AKA web/graphic design, animation, gaming, and everything else cool in this world.)

Know what, you bitchass flaming ho!? I'm being professionally trained now, not just doodling, and by the end of it -- you'll be fucking begging for my art. So fuuuuuckkkkkkkkkkkk youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.

:D

Yeah, I can be pretty conceited and self-righteous, and I want to be the fucking best. But it's only to compensate for my extremely low self-esteem, or something.

OMG. That reminds me.

Mello is officially a girl. I went to Best Buy, and the Misa action figure was in the Mello box. Annoying, because I wanted to buy it, but also amusing. Epic fail, Mello, epic fail forever. <3

*crawls to bed*

Death Note doujinshi x2

2008-08-19T13:18:33Z

My apologies for taking so long to post these. I am epic fail. Please comment, even if it's only to beat me with a virtual stick.

Title: CIRCULUS VITIOSUS
Doujinka: Deathly Noted
Pairing: LightxL
Genres: Psychological, angst, romance, friendship
Rating: PG-13
Pages: 17, including front and back cover
Warning: It isn't inked; it's sketched in pencil. Morbidity and mature themes.
Download: MediaFire

Title: Time Signature
Doujinka: Deathly Noted
Pairing: NearxLinda
Genres: Romance
Rating: PG-13
Pages: 9, including front and back cover
Warning: It isn't inked; it's sketched in pencil.
Download: MediaFire

Hello, from my corner of the world to yours. ^_^

2008-08-05T04:28:51Z

Eek. I've been dead to the Net for like three weeks!? Sorry. D: It all began when my grandmother died, and then I became deathly ill and was bedridden, and then... (sounds ridiculous, but 'tis the truth)... but anyway. XD

1...

Have any of you read the MelloxMatt doujinshi Limelight by Dizzy Melon? I was doing some research for a fanfic, and as it turns out, the church club in the doujinshi really exists in New York City and is the doujinshi's namesake. (Perhaps it says that in the afterword, but I can't read Japanese.)

Limelight, 660 Sixth Ave. @ 20th Street. (212) 807-7780
The famous converted church club has finally reopened! The balconies are great for people watching and the stained glass windows add a uniquely surreal touch. 5 rooms playing different kinds of music. Cover: $25. Hours: Wed - Sun 10pm-4am. Must be 18 or older. Subway: F, N, R to 23rd St.

Interesting, eh? To geeky me, anyway.

2...

And in case you don't hit Anime News Network:

This year's 36th issue of Shueisha's Weekly Shonen Jump magazine has confirmed on Monday that the Death Note writer/artist team of Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata are launching a manga called Bakuman in the next issue, which goes on sale on August 11. The magazine describes the new manga as "explosive." (The Japanese word for "explosion" is "bakuhatsu").

My heart rate literally sky-rocketed when I read that. HELL YES HELL YES HELL YES. I WANT YOUR DEATH NOTE BABY!

3...

Will post more homemade Death Note doujinshi soon. Scanning sucks, but I plan to do it tomorrow. (O rly? Ya rly.)

Worst entry ever?

2008-07-14T06:08:31Z

So, I'm starting college this fall, and tonight my mind began musing over what sort of clothing I should wear the first day. (Yes, I am that obsessive, overthinking, et cetera...)

Scheme 1: Cosplay as a Death Note character.

Pros: Attract people who like my ultimate obsession.

Cons: May immediately cement myself as an obsessive otaku and repel even more casual anime fans.

Scheme 2: Splurge on a Sweet Lolita dress and stand out like heck.

Pros: Not just a face in the crowd. Attract people of like interests. Perhaps the general public would take interest in my exotic apparel and choose to comment on it.

Cons: Again, just too weird to approach!? Worse case scenario, maybe people would poke fun at me for dressing so cutesy... I would REALLY stand out, after all. Do I want that much attention on the first day, or would it be better to reserve my Sweet Lolita attack until I've made some friends or at least settled in?

Scheme 3: T-shirt and jeans.

Pros: More approachable because I'm an everyman? Attract a variety of people.

Cons: Nothing to make me stand out. Clothing can't act as a conversation starter.

Scheme 4: Death Note T-shirt and jeans.

Pros: Attract people who like my ultimate obsession. Even anime fans who aren't familiar with Death Note will know that I like anime (cosplay may be unrecognizable to non-fans as cosplay). Mostly normal looking and approachable?

Cons: Creepy artwork on my shirt and the words Death Note -- totally not approachable?

Scheme 5: Something stylish, i.e. a vintage dress.

Pros: Generally presentable and 'pretty'. Stand out, but not a ridiculous amount.

Cons: Looks like I'm trying too hard to be fashionable?

...

A glimpse into the workings of my mind, which you probably never wanted to see. XD;; This is how my thought process churns on and on and on, 24/7. It is... torture?

Anyway, which outfit do you recommend out of the options listed above!? Or something else entirely? Please put an end to my social anxieties. D:

Run! Run! It's the Great Flood!

2008-07-09T05:06:50Z

My productivity level has crashed, thanks to Naruto fansubs. (I was reading/watching the official releases, if you can "believe it!", pun intended.) I'm obsessive as hell, so either I work to the point where my wrist feels like it's splintering, or I laze around all day and marathon anime/fanfiction/etc. *beats personality with stick*

Also thanks to Naruto, I have constant cravings for ramen, and to a lesser extent, potato chips. Does anyone else get massive ramen cravings from watching Naruto!? This show is going to make me gain weight, which actually isn't a bad thing (except in the eyes of society), because I tend to lose weight from lack of appetite, overworking myself, et cetera... or maybe it is a bad thing to gain the weight back, especially from junk food, because then my heart will have to deal with the strain of weight fluctuations? I feel so small and senseless when it comes to scientific, mathematic, and medical matters, even if I research them online. Am I losing weight and have no appetite because I have a disease, or am I making myself sick with malnutrition? That is the question... to ask a doctor, but doctor-schmoctor, I say!

Anyway, all is not lost. I am slowly hacking away at my doujinshi, and I have also started sketching "MY GREAT DEATH NOTE MASTERPIECE!!♥♥sparkle~" My mantra is that it's going to resemble Death Note cover art. I know it isn't literally possible to match Takeshi Obata, but... I want to at least prove to myself that I can create something at a quality level I haven't before. I was looking through my artwork, and I realized I've never even created a polished piece, carefully sketched and inked and colored... and honestly, I cried. I feel so frustrated with my artwork lately that I look at how worthless it is and cry.

I don't even have the skills to do an art commission. I'm 19 years old and I can't properly support myself. I'm broke. I'm a burden on my family. I can't do anything. I have to change... as I always say, but nothing changes. I have to be better, better, better (God, please, am I perfect yet?) but then I am the definition of the cliché "Jack of all trades, master of none." Artist, writer, composer, graphic and web designer... everything, more, better, but in the end, I end up failing at everything.

I envy those who have a single passion to devote themselves to in life, that sense of purposefulness and a path, so much... and I almost even envy those who have nothing they feel passionate about. It would be so easy to care about nothing, to just be carried along by the breeze, because right now, I'm struggling so hard it hurts. It's like I'm screaming, stretch me thinner, cut me deeper, strip me, rape me... just give me what I want in the end. I could endure the dirty gritty ugly for awhile if I arrived at the utmost luminescence. I want to be good enough -- just enough to not be disgusted with myself -- I want it so. fucking. bad.

P.S. Why are there suddenly a million moths in my room? D:

P.P.S. I ♥ Wikipedia. I looked up the phrase "Jack of all trades, master of none," and discovered that it is, in full, "Jack of all trades, master of none, though ofttimes better than master of one." I feel marginally better about myself. :'D

P.P.P.S. If you actually read this entry... this entry of ultimate wangst, with three post scripts... I am impressed.

Lolita love!

2008-07-02T21:02:02Z

They're all by BABY, THE STARS SHINE BRIGHT, my new favorite brand, and they are... $336, $394, and $485, respectively!? *sobs brokenly*

Someday... someday, I will buy a Sweet Lolita dress... and a collection of Death Note cosplay wigs too!! That is my utterly frivolous goal in life. 8D

Speaking of cosplay... I need a haircut, so do you think I should dye my hair red and get Matt's haircut or stick with my natural hair color, brown, and get Light's haircut? (Yes, I am geeky enough to get a Death Note inspired haircut. My previous haircuts have been inspired by Gackt and such.)

MelloxMatt doujinshi

2008-07-01T23:36:01Z

Deathly Noted presents her first Death Note doujinshi!! YOSH!!!

Title: (a)symmetry
Doujinka: Deathly Noted
Pairing: MelloxMatt
Genres: Angst, romance, friendship
Rating: PG-13
Pages: 8, including front and back cover
Warning: It isn't inked; it's sketched in pencil.
Download: MediaFire

Please tell me if you're interested in reading more doujinshi of this quality level. I have a Near/Linda doujinshi completed and a LightxL doujinshi in progress. Yes, yes, I do.

Also, C&C is greatly appreciated. That's how I'll improve what I make next time, right?

Death Note graphics

2008-06-28T19:00:13Z

Another batch of Death Note icons, plus an alternate version of my Transform!! remixed manga as requested by kalium_kx. Commenting and crediting is appreciated.


1	2	3	4

5	6	7	8

9	10	11	12

And... name that image!
1-2: Manga, chapter 30 (Misa's crappy drawings). I cropped the line "Asses, fine," from Misa's explanation about sunglasses. *cackles madly*
3: Manga, chapter 67.
4: Anime, episode 8.
5-10: Manga, Mello from chapter 60 and Matt from chapter 83.
11-12: Know Your Enemy by Dizzy Melon.

Remixed Death Note manga

2008-06-26T21:50:18Z

I remixed the Death Note manga to make three comedy comics. Check it. :3

Preview

Marry Meep

Light's Beautiful World

Transform!!

Does anyone know the technical term for this form of graphics? I don't want to call it "editing manga", because that has the negative connotations of censorship, but the term "remixed manga" is definitely something I made up. *runs around in circles*

Also, please tell me if there were places where you couldn't read the text, didn't know which panel to read next, etc. because I've never done this before.

Time to take a bath, princess.

2008-06-26T11:28:14Z

I've been making so many graphics these past few days (will probably share them later today), I even dreamt about making LiveJournal icons. SaaaaaaaaaD.

I love this sleep schedule I'm on, though. 11PM-7AM: a perfect 8 hours of sleep. I feel like I can conquer the world!

P.S. I'm so addicted to this song right now! Download it. Strangely, this happens with many of my favorite songs: I scarcely if ever listen to them, then one day the melody pops into my head and I desperately scramble to find the MP3 amongst a sea of thousands. o.O

Will you remember my name?

2008-06-24T12:10:40Z

I was working on some Death Note doujinshi and had an epiphany... like, my life's purpose came to me. I'm always feeling so worthless and inadequate, obsessing over how I'm not good enough because I haven't written the next Harry Potter or Fruits Basket, or received a thousand and a half reviews on my fanfic, or how I'm wasting away my days without "becoming someone" or "doing something"...

But everyday, I'm creating things with my own hands, which is more than a lot of people can say... and if what I create makes even one person happy, entertains that person for even an instant... then it's worth it. It's worth the work I put into it. It's worth existing.

I don't have to stress and obsess over being famous or published or anything like that. I should just do what I can to enjoy my life and make others' lives enjoyable too, because as fatalistic and saddening as this is to admit... we're all going to die... even this planet will eventually die... and there will come a time when the oeuvres of the greatest artists don't exist. Even fame is finite, so...

Carpe diem!

Motto agete motto motto agete!

2008-06-23T19:31:48Z

I have a confession to make... I'm addicted to reversed Utada Hikaru music.

What can I say? Utada Hikaru's music reversed > 99% normal music. :3

Utada Hikaru - Take 5 (Reversed) ♥

Utada Hikaru - EULB ARTLU a.k.a. ULTRA BLUE (Reversed)
01. Passion (Reversed) ♥
02. Eclipse (Interlude) (Reversed)
03. Be My Last (Reversed)
04. WINGS (Reversed)
05. Kairo (Reversed)
06. One Night Magic feat. Yamada Masashi (Reversed)
07. COLORS (Reversed)
08. Dareka no Negai ga Kanau Koro (Reversed)
09. Making Love (Reversed)
10. Nichiyou no Asa (Reversed)
11. BLUE (Reversed) ♥
12. Keep Tryin' (Reversed)
13. This Is Love (Reversed) ♥

Many happy bento

2008-06-21T17:44:28Z

I've recently gotten into the hobby of looking at and making bento - cute/artistic/etc. boxed lunches. Check out my first five.

FIRST BENTO

Contents: Pea pods, pre-fried tofu from the Asian grocery store with peanut/chili garlic/soy sauce, and you can't really see them, but there are four steamed veggie dumplings underneath the tofu.

The tofu was so good! I highly recommend buying pre-fried tofu if you can find it -- it's ultra convenient and tasty too. I thought the sauce was a hit, but I'll combine just about any Asian sauces and think it tastes delicious (soy sauce + Chinese hot mustard = BLISS), so I don't know if you can trust my opinion...

SECOND BENTO

Kitty wants my bento. XD

Contents: Soba noodles, fried egg, sprouts, pickled ginger 'cherry blossom', sesame seeds, and three marinated mozzarella balls from Wegmans. I ate the soba noodles with wasabi-soy dipping sauce, but I didn't take a picture of it.

THIRD BENTO

Contents: Soy sauce scrambled eggs, vegetarian chicken nuggets, lettuce, and duck sauce for dipping.

As for the soy sauce scrambled eggs... catchy name, but they basically tasted the same as normal scrambled eggs. I'd add chili garlic sauce or something if I made them again.

FOURTH BENTO

Contents: Pre-packaged lemon pepper vegetables (cauliflower, baby carrots, broccoli), vegetarian chicken tender with provolone cheese (I ripped the slice in half before melting it to make the zig-zag pattern), and pesto on the side.

FIFTH BENTO

Contents: Cheese ravioli with decorative wasabi, baby carrots, and a strawberry.

Making faces with wasabi is not easy... and who eats wasabi ravioli, anyway? XD;

Death Note icons

2008-06-20T23:17:32Z

Lest these icons collect dust on my hard drive, I decided to post them online. I hope at least one person likes them? Commenting and crediting is appreciated... critique, too, if you have the energy. :D


1	2	3

4	5	6

7	8	9

10	11	12

13	14	15

16	17	18

Where's that sodding image from!?
1-4: Blanc et Noir artbook
5-7: Manga, chapter 9
8: Manga, chapter 19
9-11: Anime, badass second opening video
12-13: Anime, episode 8
14: Kokuyo doujinshi
15: Orange Note by Peach Note
16-18: Pieta by Balgus REC

twitch

2008-06-20T05:43:00Z

...

*SHRIEKS*

*STOMPS FEET*

*RIPS OUT HAIR*

*KICKS LIVEJOURNAL REPEATEDLY*

...

I cannot coexist with these plus account ads. Either they go or I go. I guess I'm a spoiled brat from having an ad-free account for all those years, but... my god, this really itches my perfectionist tendencies. How can I make an elegant layout with ads? And no, I absolutely cannot block the ads on my computer only--the ad parasite will still be lurking there, beneath the skin--!

I don't even have LJ friends to ask for help...

Life is cruel...

Finis.

ab ovo

2008-06-19T14:34:21Z

O, my minty fresh LiveJournal, how I love thee! Now I can worship Death Note daily and be generally geeky.

Sketched this in openCanvas just now. Mwahaha.

Well, I'm off to work on my layout. Feel free to friend me, you all everybody. ^_^